Tomorrow I’m gone.

Leaving a country is painful, like leaving someone you loved and cherished. And in fact, you never leave just a physical space but you do leave the people that connect you to that land. You are closing the door to all the possible future you might have with them, may they be good, may they make you stronger, may they be destructive. You are saying goodbye to friends, and to all the experiences and moments you lived together, and the one you might have had in the future.

The prospect of leaving a country always make my eyes water, my throat close and my belly ache. I’m not just taking an airplane and discovering a new place, I’m saying goodbye forever to the person I was, at that time and space in my life. This is not only a goodbye to friends but to my self.

Tomorrow I’m gone, and today I’m only half here.

It feels like I’m separated in half. I’m already two person, the one I was yesterday, the one I will be tomorrow. Both brave, both carefree, both sensitive. It is possible to cry of happiness and sadness at the same time and the ticking clock toward my departure create a conflicted feeling of gratefulness, hope and regret.

It’s my last day in Bali and I have to make it count. But the prospect of doing anything else than staying in a warm swimming pool to cure the hangover from the too-many-cocktail from Deus ex machina, Pretty Poison, and Sandbar is not appealing. So we chat, we swim, we float and we laugh. Before everybody get together for dinner, I join Sashi in her recording Studio. It feels special and unique to be there. Tomorrow I’m gone, but I’ll remember, forever of these moments spent in Bali.